cataclysm-guild-mounts

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  • Breakfast Topic: The Kron'Kar Annihilator is the coolest thing ever, period

    by 
    Mathew McCurley
    Mathew McCurley
    09.23.2010

    There is nothing cooler in the entire history of World of Warcraft than the forthcoming Kron'Kar Annihilator. None. The Kron'Kar Annihilator is naming perfection coupled with such a beautiful simplicity. Let us analyze, scientifically of course, why this is so. The discussion is broken into three parts, consisting of the "Kron'Kar" element, the "Annihilator" element and the scorpion element. First, words with apostrophes and hard consonant sounds are awesome. Kron'Kar has both, and then some. Double hard consonant "k" sounds punctuate both the ferocity and dangerousness of the powerful scorpion. The apostrophe lets you know that this beast follows in a tradition of badassery, such as Thrall's elite Kor'kron guard, or Drek'thar, leader of the mighty Frostwolf clan. Hard consonant sounds make saying Kron'Kar fun and intimidating. Second, there is really nothing past annihilation in terms of things you can do to something or someone. Annihilating is pretty much it. You're gone, buddy. The Kron'Kar Annihilator annihilates. It's built in right there in the name! Third, it's a scorpion. Seriously, are you going to tell me that scorpions aren't the most badass thing? It has claws, a stinger and -- since it is presumed that the Kron'Kar Annihilator is going to be the Horde guild mount -- is big enough to carry at least a tauren. I am putting on a diaper as we speak, because I just might be paralyzed with fear and defecate myself upon seeing a giant scorpion barreling down on me, Horde soldier atop its armored back, with nothing but hatred in both their hearts and the impending annihilation ever-present in the beasts' nomenclature. We have already seen the Alliance's lion guild mount. The Kron'Kar Annihilator is the Horde equivalent. What do you think about the new guild mounts? Can anything be more awesome than a mountable scorpion?