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Bury the Shovelware: Elf Bowling 1 & 2
It's Christmas Eve, and Santa has come a little early. But apparently we've all been very terrible, for there exists a gift far worse than coal. In fact, coal seems downright awesome compared to this. After all, it's flammable. I am being utterly sincere when I say that I would much rather play Cake Mania 2 than this pile of reindeer droppings. Pedigree Elf Bowling 1 & 2 shares the same developer and publisher: Ignition Entertainment. A quick scan of their products page shows a great diversity in games. Notably but understandably missing is this game. It's difficult to comprehend the fact that the same resources which gave us the excellent and underrated Mercury Meltdown Revolution are also responsible for Elf Bowling 1 & 2. The company also published Metal Slug 7 in North America. The Critics Said ... Metacritic is a great tool to use when I determine the critics' reception of a game for this series. I've referenced the bottom of the list before. According to the "Index of Nintendo DS Game Reviews by Score" page, the worst-received game for the DS is Deal or No Deal with a metascore of 17. Yet Elf Bowling for the DS manages to do that 5 points better -- err, worse -- with a metascore of 12. Why it doesn't appear on the list is because it only contains four reviews and five are needed to appear on the grand tally. The four critics that did review Elf Bowling (the poor, poor souls) are all fairly consistent in stating that this game is the suck.
DS Daily: Accidents
Today we're wondering about some of the more horrible things that could've happened to your DS. We've been known to drop ours every now and then, and we were the unfortunate recipients of some scratches on the touch-screen after we let our little cousin play with it a bit. How about you? Have you let a relative play your DS, only to find it scratched every which way? Have you dropped it down a flight of stairs or on the street? What's the worst thing that's happened to your DS*?*Not counting Elf Bowling
Five games to buy for people you hate
Gaming sites are inundated with holiday gift guides at the end of the year, listing the best and most popular games that everyone pretty much already has (or knows about). Well, we're not going in for that this year. Our gift guide will help you find the best gifts in categories the other sites won't cover -- because we just made them up.Do you just love handing out the most horrific holiday gifts? If you're the kind of person who actually tucks sticks and coal into the stocking of a loved one on Christmas Eve, then this list is for you. It's all about the worst of the worst, the bottom of the barrel -- the games you would shudder to find on your own shelf, or worse, tainting your DS. Before you ask -- yes, we do love to see you cringe and suffer at the horrors we spring on you. Aren't we sweet?
DS Daily: Born free
There are a lot of games on the DS whose origins are in free online games. Some, like Diner Dash, Nervous Brickdown, and the upcoming N+ and WordJong, are good, or even great. Some are Elf Bowling 1&2. In every case of a free game getting remade as a DS cartridge, money is charged.Do you have any games based on freeware? Do you plan on getting any in the near future? Is compelling gameplay enough to warrant a purchase for a portable console, when the experience can be had for nothing on PC? Or do you require significant expansion and upgrading before you'd even consider it?Our personal view: even if a game costs nothing, that doesn't mean it has no value. We don't want to pay strictly for portability, but we're entirely willing to shell out for new content in a game whose progenitors were once free. Not Elf Bowling 1&2, though.
Conjecture Countdown: One more day!
With only one more day of waiting before the debut of the diminished E3, we've decided to get serious and offer up some real predictions about what we will -- and won't -- see at the show. Check after the jump for the breakdown, by writer, of the good, the bad, and the ugly sides of our E3 hopes and fears.
