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Uwe Boll will return to the director's chair for The Rampage 2
Notorious filmmaker Uwe Boll has announced plans for a sequel to his controversial 2009 film, The Rampage. Like its predecessor, The Rampage 2 will star Brendan Fletcher as an unhinged man driven to violent acts. Instead of centering on a bloody killing spree as in The Rampage, the sequel will see Fletcher's character taking hostages at a TV station, then using his captives as "a political platform to awaken humanity." According to the Hollywood Reporter, The Rampage 2 will be filmed over the course of a six-day shoot in British Columbia. Word that Boll is working on The Rampage 2 comes only a few short months after the director attempted to fund a sequel to his film adaptation of Postal on Kickstarter. Unfortunately for Boll, that effort only raised $29,977 of the $500,000 he was seeking. There is currently no word on when we can expect to see The Rampage 2 in theaters, though if the movie follows the same path as Boll's other recent films expect it to skip movie houses entirely and go straight to DVD.
Uwe Boll's Postal 2 dream fueled by Kickstarter, morbid curiosity
Uwe Boll, the eccentric film director known for weaponizing video game licenses, is counting on Kickstarter to help fund a sequel to "Postal," a movie that critics called a movie if they were in a polite mood. Boll's Kickstarter for Postal 2 requests $500,000 to manufacture a "controversial comedy in which we take up current political issues" and elucidate "that there is no difference between our democracy and the prison camps in Russia or China." In the pitch videos, which are split into joking and serious parts – and no, they're not distinguishable beyond the labels – Boll says "there is only me who can help you with that." The "that" is actually the "them": the NSA and the monitored Orwellian nightmare we find ourselves in. "If you have a Facebook account," Boll says ahead of his filmed critique, "everything gets, like, controlled." You'll receive several status updates on the film if you pledge at least $5 in advance of its projected August 2014 release, but the high-tier rewards (beyond the grotesque pleasure of seeing this lurch to life) seem impossible to turn down. For just $5,000 you could name a character in Postal 2. For $7,500 you can allow yourself to be encased in Boll's celluloid prison and BECOME a character, though the size of the role "depends on your talent." The implication here is that you will have to match and exceed the acting chops of the movie's first confirmed star and Top 36 contender in American Idol Season 8, Jackie Tohn. Finally, you can pledge $10,000 and view the spectacle unfold on the movie set itself, safely shielded behind the "executive producer" credit. (So that's what those guys do.) "There will be no survivors" if this uncensored movie comes to pass, Uwe Boll says. If that isn't the ideal ratio of threat and reward for a Kickstarter campaign, what is?
Bloodrayne screenwriter explains the perils of working with Uwe Boll
"Scripts are late. Writers are two years late. I was two weeks late," Bloodrayne film screenwriter Guinevere Turner passionately explains in an interview pulled from "Tales From the Script," a documentary showcasing stories from across the world of screenwriting. "Uwe Boll calls me [on the phone], 'This is fucking disgusting! You lied to me! Where is my script?!'," she continues, demonstrating how she held the phone away from her head as he yelled. Unsurprisingly, Turner wasn't a fan of being yelled at, and instructed her manager to make sure she never heard from Boll again. When she turned in the script, however, Turner still expected to work with Boll on future drafts. That wasn't to be, as she recalls that Boll accepted the very first "nasty, little scrappy draft"and went right into production (though she notes that only about 20 percent of what she wrote made it into the film's final cut). When Bloodrayne finally debuted at Los Angeles' famous "Mann's Chinese Theater," Turner says she was the only one in the room of production staff "laughing out loud." Adding insult to injury, Turner closes the interview by saying, "It's like a 25 million dollar movie, and it blows! I mean, it's like the worst movie ever made." But then, maybe she hasn't seen Far Cry?
'Zombie Massacre' is another gaming film from Uwe Boll
You know, for as much flak as he gets on the reg, we can't help but respect Uwe Boll's plucky sense of determination. Does he let a cinematic track record that is most politely described as "less than fantastic" keep him down? Hell no! If boxing has taught him anything, it's "don't let abysmal critical and box-office performance keep you from purchasing the rights to video games and makin' movies about 'em." Also, "punch dudes." The latest intellectual property to climb in the ring with Boll is a bit more obscure than his previous adaptations: Zombie Massacre, an unreleased Wii title from 1988 Games. Now aiming for a Wii U release via an unannounced publisher, 1988 Games tells us that they'll be attempting to sync the game's release with the film's production as much as possible. The film treatment will be directed by Luca Boni and Marco Ristori (both of whom co-directed Boll's Italian zombie thriller Eaters) and produced by Boll. No official release date has been set, but you can hop past the break to check out the full poster. We're no Ebert and Roeper, but we're guessing the film's tagline is a bit more apt than they were hoping.
The Anvil of Crom: Can Funcom capitalize on the Conan film reboot?
I don't know about you, Age of Conan-faithful, but I'm a hopeless film trailer junkie. I collect them. I watch (and re-watch) them on my computer, my phone, my television, and of course, at the cinema proper. A lot of the time, trailers are substantially better than the full-length films they're meant to sell, and I've even been known to pay full price for a ticket only to walk out after the preview (particularly when said preview concerned a long-awaited prequel and was inexplicably tacked on to the front of Meet Joe Black). Given that Conan already plays a significant role in my gaming life, I think deconstructing the recently released trailer for the upcoming film franchise reboot makes a certain sort of sense. Sadly, Massively isn't a haven for film criticism, but I'd like to get around that by doing a bit of theorizing on how the new flick could conceivably affect our favorite MMORPG.
Alone in the Dark 2 movie heading straight to DVD this holiday
It's been four years since Uwe Boll first graced American cinemas with his game-to-film masterpiece, Alone in the Dark. Though only acting as producer (rather than his usual directorial role), he's finally bringing the sequel to our shores this holiday with Alone in the Dark 2. Rather than waste time with those silly theaters, Alone in the Dark 2 will be heading straight to DVD, said to be coming "this Winter." You might be thinking to yourself, "I didn't even know they made a second film," like the first (and only) commenter on the movie's IMDB page did. And after checking out that page, you might be wondering how the film's main character (Edward Carnby) inexplicably changed from Christian Slater to Korean-American actor Rick Yune. We're gonna chock both up to one simple answer: Movie magic. [Via Big Download]
Uwe Boll is adapting everyone's favorite video game, Bloodrayne 3
At the risk of being repeatedly pawnched, we think we can accurately describe all of Uwe Boll's video game-based films as "wretched." However, we've got a theory for why that is -- his attempt to adhere to the plot of these games limited his otherwise limitless directing potential. Fortunately, that won't be a problem on his next film project: Bloodrayne 3: Warhammer, a film based on a video game which does not exist. We'll contact Majesco to find out if this means another Bloodrayne title is secretly in the works -- but let's be honest, now. This sounds a lot like some good ol' fashioned Bollnanigans. Bollshines. Bollduggery. [Thanks to everyone who sent this in!]
Uwe Boll paid to be in Postal 3
Well, this is a new take on a celebrity guest appearance. Running With Scissors boss Vince Desi told Eurogamer that cinematic auteur Uwe Boll paid to be included in the company's upcoming Postal 3. It's doubly ironic, as we're fairly sure Postal 3 isn't ever going to come out.But before we rush to judgment: Is it possible that Boll is trying to look better by comparison? Like you know how known super-fat guy Fatty Arbuckle used to pay a bunch of ultra-fat guys to hang around with him just so people would be like "Hey, you know, Fatty's not looking that fat."? Maybe this is like that, but with being terrible.
Avoid getting beaten up by funding Boll's next film
We've all said more than a few not-so-kind words about the collected works of the German film-mangler known as Uwe Boll -- a fact that divides the gaming community into two different groups: The Punched, and The Soon To Be Punched. Sorry, gang. It's an inevitable conclusion. You messed with the Boll, and now you're gonna get the horns.Maybe, just maybe, he'll take you off his list if you help pay for his next film -- he's currently asking his supporters (and his bizarrely dedicated detractors) to help him foot the $18.5 million bill required to produce Blackout, his potentially upcoming "terrorist disaster epic". We assume he's talking about the plot of the film there, and not just previewing the buzzwords reviewers will use when critiquing the picture.Kookily enough, avoiding pending pummeling isn't the only thing contributors have to gain from their donations -- hundreds will be chosen from the pool of would-be producers and rewarded with small roles in the film, as well as cash prizes ultimately equaling half of the amount Boll is asking people to donate. Also, at the end of next year, Boll will hold another raffle in which over 300 contributors will receive 20 percent of the film's annual profits; or, in simpler terms, absolutely nothing.
Sam Raimi thinks a Warcraft movie has potential
The hottest topic that didn't get discussed at BlizzCon this year was the WoW movie -- last year, we had a whole panel dedicated to how it was going, but this year, all we got was a vague mention that it's still being worked on. Still, the biggest question that hangs in the air is just who might direct it, and we've got our first rumor: Sam Raimi, he of Spiderman and The Evil Dead series. He's not exactly hired yet, but he is quoted by MTV Movies as being interested in the Warcraft story and universe.He's got my greenlight -- I don't know how good a movie it would be (Spiderman 3 is proof that Raimi, quirky as he is, can go off the rails at times), but any movie with Bruce Campbell in it works for me. And you know we'd get at least a cameo if Raimi took the helm. But at the very least, it sounds like Raimi has the right ideas to get a Warcraft movie together: "It has such great, adventurous characters in it," he says, "and such fantastic landscapes and rules."If you're going to start looking for directors, you could definitely do a lot worse. At least we know Uwe Boll will never direct it.Thanks to everyone who sent this in!
Far Cry, a Uwe Boll joint, premiering in Germany Oct. 2
We've been told that attending a premiere for a Uwe Boll movie is like visiting Disneyland in the middle of a category five hurricane -- it's a disaster, certainly, but it's a fun disaster. That's why we were so dismayed to learn that Boll's latest dose of box office poison won't be making its maiden voyage in the States -- but rather, in the pugilistic director's homeland of Germany.If you're truly dedicated to your pursuit of attending the debut of a Boll-sterpiece, you'd better make your travel arrangements now, as the film will rear its ugly head October 2. We probably won't be in attendance, so make sure you tell us how it was, and what it was like meeting all those movie stars people who were in the movie former Wienerwald employees.
See Uwe Boll's game: 1968 Tunnel Rats
1968 Tunnel Rats is the Panama Canal of entertainment. Why? It's absolutely insane to think that anyone could actually pull it off and, if it does work, it will be a key conduit for international maritime trade. 1968 Tunnel Rats is a game and a movie being developed simultaneously. Oh, and the movie doesn't have a script, it's all improvised (which was a much better idea the first time we heard it in Tropic Thunder.) Let's see, are we forgetting anything? ... Oh, yes. Both are being made by Uwe Boll. Brace yourself: We've got a trailer after the break.
Breakfast Topic: Warcraft movie casting call
So the Wrath cinematic is out. It's gotten mixed reviews, with players like Mike Schramm generally unimpressed and disappointed there aren't any Gnomes, and other players, like myself, really liking it. In fact, I think it's the best World of Warcraft cinematic trailer to date. Whatever anyone thinks, though -- love it or hate it -- the cinematic has stirred thoughts about the World of Warcraft movie. Some people, impressed with the CGI, have even suggested that the movie should be done as a full-length animation a la Advent Children. It's almost unsettling not to have any news on the movie, despite Blizzard's modus operandi of keeping everything under wraps until "it's ready". In fact, the last news we heard was how Blizzard laughed off B-movie hack Uwe Boll. While that's certainly good news, it's been quite some time and we're quickly approaching Legendary Pictures' pegged release date of 2009. While I trust Legendary Pictures (behind Superman Returns, 300 and The Dark Knight), let's take matters into our own hands this morning and cast the movie. Even if it were done as an animation, you'd still need some actors for their voices. WoW player and Blizzard fan Brandon Routh expressed wanting to be in the movie, so why not? He'd make a good... uh... human, I guess. Varian Wrynn, maybe? We'll hear more for sure in the upcoming, sold out BlizzCon, but for now we can play casting directors and imagine who should play who in a Warcraft film. Who would you cast in the Warcraft movie?
An evening with Uwe Boll's Postal
Uwe Boll. It's a name that strikes fear and anger into the hearts of at least 248,969 gamers worldwide. Through his continued efforts in bringing critically bashed adaptations of video games to our attentions, he's earned an online reputation that's only rivaled in the community by the likes of Jack Thompson.To be honest, I didn't know what to expect when I was invited to an early screening of Uwe Boll's latest film, Postal. Perhaps I'm in the minority, but I have never experienced an Uwe Boll film. Perhaps it's because Boll has never touched any of my most beloved game franchises. Looking at his past films, it appears he hasn't made as many films to justify the fervor that surrounds him. Is anyone really angry that the House of the Dead film wasn't A-grade cinematic material? Is the film somehow a disgrace to the game's "legacy?" Doubtful. Are people really up-in-arms over how he "ruined" BloodRayne, or Alone in the Dark?Postal is also an interesting choice for the German director. Very few have actually played the game (neither have I) -- but those that have don't really like it. Even if the film amounted to a terrible disaster, it wouldn't disgrace the game, or the "genre" of the video game film (if such a thing should be considered). With all of this in mind, the curtains opened and Uwe Boll's Postal screening started.
Stride Gum pitching in to stop Uwe Boll
Sometimes news comes across our digital desk that's just too odd not to pass along to you. This is just one of those stories: The makers of Stride Gum are putting 1 million packs of gum on the line to put a stop to Uwe Boll's directing career. In short, if this petition receives another 764,000 signatures or so by May 14, the company's going to give every one of the signers a free pack of gum on May 23.Wait, this is a publicity stunt? Oh, yeah, we know. But you know what else we know? We love free gum. These are the kind of moral quandaries you get into every day as a video game blogger, but we're pretty sure we made the right call on this one.
The best of WoW Insider: April 22-29, 2008
Joystiq's sister site WoW Insider is dedicated like a Night Elf Hunter's pet leveled up to the highest loyalty to bringing you news from all over Azeroth. From the upcoming patch 2.4.2 to everything you need to know about the next expansion, Wrath of the Lich King, we've got your your back just like that sneaky Shadowstepping Rogue. Ok, well not quite in that way, but you know what we mean. Here's our top posts from the last week in Warcraft. News Patch 2.4.2 notes released Blizzard announced what's coming down in the next (bugfix, not content) patch. Undocumented changes in 2.4.2 And we cover what they didn't announce. Blizzard to Boll: Thanks, but no thanks Well at least we can say one good thing about the Warcraft movie: Uwe Boll won't be directing it. Macro for a prettier WoW Type this into your console, and spice up the look of Azeroth's environments. Drysc reveals Arena Season 4 ratings requirements and rules News about the Brutal Gladiator gear coming in Season 4, and how Blizzard is fighting win trading. Features Guildwatch: "officers dont do officers like u did" Drama, downed and recruiting news from around the realms -- oh my! Blood Sport: No scrubs allowed in Season 4 Our Arena PvP column lays out the changes to requirements in Season 4, and if you're not good, you're not getting gear. Spiritual Guidance: Three priest specs your raid shouldn't leave Shattrath without Tips for holy priests, or raids who want their help. The Care and Feeding of Warriors: Are Warriors underpowered? Matthew Rossi might be crazy -- but he also might be right. Five tips to minimize raiding downtime Five ways to keep the mobs coming while raiding with a larger group of players.
Uwe Boll thinks Michael Bay 'sucks big time', wants to fight
We were always taught to "use our words" to solve disputes between our peers and colleagues; but we guess if your words are ogreish and oft-incomprehensible, your fists will have to do. That's right -- Uwe Boll, much like the honor-bruised 1800 presidential candidate Aaron Burr, has officially donned the boxing gloves he wore in the Webcritic Massacre of 2006 (and while he wrote the script for "Postal", we assume) and challenged the king of summer blockbusters, Michael Bay, to twelve rounds in the ring.No offense, Bay -- we loved "Bad Boys 2", but you'll forgive us for putting our money on Boll's massive ham-fists. What that guy lacks in movie making ability and social graces, he more than makes up with his pugilistic proclivities.
Blizzard to Boll: Thanks, but no thanks
There is probably no name more reviled in the realm of film than Uwe Boll -- he's the man behind such horrible games-to-films as House of the Dead and Alone in the Dark (the latter of which, I am somewhat embarrassed to say, I tried to watch). And while it isn't really news that Uwe Boll isn't directing the World of Warcraft movie (we already knew, from back at Blizzcon, that Legendary Pictures is handling it, and Boll usually uses his own financing and production companies), but this is too great a story to pass up. Apparently when Boll heard that a Warcraft movie was being made, he actually went to Blizzard to try to get it done, and they told him straight up: no, never, not in a million years.Actually, Boll himself tells the story over on MTV Movies as "we will not sell the movie rights, not to you.... especially not to you." Which is pretty hilarious. He himself also says that "because it's such a big online game success, maybe a bad movie would destroy that ongoing income, what the company has with it." So yes, he pretty much guarantees that any movie he makes would be a bad movie anyway.So there's at least one great thing we can say about the Warcraft movie so far: Blizzard at least cares enough about the quality of the flick to not let Uwe Boll make it. This doesn't guarantee us a good movie, of course. But it's nice to know that the higher ups at Blizzard know to keep their property away from this nut.[via Worldofwar.net]
Uwe Boll won't be making a World of Warcraft film
It's been known for some time that Blizzard has a movie adaptation of their popular World of Warcraft MMO in the works. The movie panel at last year's BlizzCon event was chock full of details, and it really seemed like they were on track. So you have to wonder at what point it got into Uwe Boll's head to approach the company about the possibility of directing such a film. Boll talks about his contact with the folks at Blizzard in a new interview with the MTV Movies blog.As you might imagine, Blizzard's response was in the negative. If you can believe Boll, their response was, "We will not sell the movie rights, not to you...especially not to you." The famed schlock director went on, "Because it's such a big online game success, maybe a bad movie would destroy that ongoing income, what the company has with it." The MTV Movie blog notes with glee that his hypothetical movie, in his estimation, would have been 'bad'. So why do one at all? We here at Massively would just like to take this opportunity to thank Blizzard for recognizing the difference between directing talent and navel lint.
Blizzard denies Boll request to direct WoW movie
That sound you just heard? It was over 10 million World of Warcraft subscribers breathing a simultaneous sigh of relief, now that the MTV Movies Blog is reporting that reviled game-film director Uwe Boll won't be getting his hands on the movie version of the popular fantasy franchise.Boll recounted a conversation with Paul Sams in which the Blizzard COO reportedly told the director, "We will not sell the movie rights, not to you ... especially not to you." In a rare moment of self-awareness, Boll seemed to understand Blizzard's reluctance, speculating that "because it's such a big online game success, maybe a bad movie would destroy that ongoing income." A bad movie? But how could the self-described "only genius in the whole fucking business" ever make a bad movie? It just doesn't make sense!Blizzard joins Konami in the exclusive "Smart companies that definitively won't let Uwe Boll near their successful franchises" club.
