Welp, that's 90 minutes we're never getting back. In a lackluster announcement event held in San Francisco on Wednesday, Samsung execs stumbled their way through repeated applause breaks to tell the world about the company's newest needless mobile device: the Samsung Fold -- a phone that expands into a tablet and costs more than a phone and tablet put together. The company also unveiled new additions to its Galaxy S line, some derivative wireless earbuds and a wearable fitness tracker. Sorry, Galaxy Home fans, you're going to have to wait until at least April for updates.
Samsung's foldable phone is officially the 'Galaxy Fold'
Mobile phone makers are increasingly pushing for screens that roll up, fold up and otherwise bend. Samsung's offering in this space is the new "Fold," a 4.6-inch phone that flips out to reveal a 7.3-inch, tablet-sized screen. And at $1980, you've got the perfect gadget to spend next month's rent on!
Samsung's more affordable Galaxy S10e will cost $750
Want to get in on the S10 action but don't have an extra $900 - $1000 laying around for the midrange or flagship models? Samsung's got you covered with the S10e, a nearly-as-good low-end handset that will save you $150 right off the bat.
Samsung's first 5G phone is a higher-spec Galaxy S10
Got your eye on the S10 but wish it had a bigger battery and access to a wireless network that won't be viable for at least a year? You are in luck because the Samsung S10 5G boasts a battery 1100 mAh bigger than its brethren and is 5G capable, though you probably guessed that from the name.
Samsung's Galaxy S10 goes wide with a third camera lens
On the other hand, if you're looking at the S10 5G and thinking to yourself "four rear-facing cameras is one too many for my liking," you're still in luck! The Samsung S10 may not be compatible with 5G networks but it does sport only three imaging devices slapped on its backside, which we all can agree is the perfect number of cameras for a smartphone to have.
Samsung's true wireless Galaxy Buds are tailor-made for the S10
Congrats, Samsung, on reinventing the AirPod. At least you managed to shave $30 off the MSRP.
Samsung's new smartwatch is focused on fitness
Perhaps the most exciting products out of the Unpacked event (that won't immediately curbstomp your bank balance) are Samsung's updated Galaxy Watch Active smartwatch and its fitness tracker, the Galaxy Fit. The $200 watch is the first Samsung wearable to offer blood pressure monitoring, which will come in handy when you get the bill for your fancy new Fold.