Are you ready to really let loose at this year's CES? If you said yes, then you'll be stoked as hell to know that our main man Steve Ballmer will be taking over Bill Gates' famous keynotes. You read that right, the scariest fratbanger this side of your last toga party will be stepping up to the plate in what we can only hope will be the kind of explosive performance we've come to expect from him. Other keynoters will be the handsome Sony CEO Sir Howard Stringer and Alan Mulally, president and CEO of Ford. Here's hoping Gates at least drops by for a cameo -- it just won't seem like CES without him.

10:23: We're en route to Sony now, stay tuned!

11:11: We're waiting outside the entrance. Tons of people in front of the entrance to the show. Veronica Belmont is getting tons of fan response for Qore. People are taking pictures with her.

11:25: We've just taken our seats at Sony's conference in front of what could only be described as a wall of screens: 7 main screens and roughly 64 smaller screens. OMG, Vaio LCD's everywhere. You'd think this was a Sony event.

We know you're all dying to find out Engadget and Joystiq's annual joint-live coverage schedule for the Big Three keynotes, so here's what you need to know. It all starts later this morning with Microsoft's Xbox 360 press conference -- but you'll be waiting until Tuesday for the big N and Sony to kick off. Links and approximate times we'll get started are listed below, we'll see you back shortly live from E3!

P.S. -Don't forget your press conference bingo cards.

Monday, July 14th
~10:30AM PT / 1:30PM ET - Live from Microsoft's E3 2008 keynote

Tuesday, July 15th
~9:00AM PT / 12:00PM ET - Live from Nintendo's E3 2008 keynote
~11:30AM PT / 2:30PM ET - Live from Sony's E3 2008 keynote

Gates and Ballmer are down at the WSJ's All Things Digital conference to talk tech with Mossberg and Swisher, and it looks like tonight they'll be unveiling the first (official) glimpses of Vista's successor, currently known as Windows 7. We'll be posting live from the event, so be sure to check back at 6:15pm PT (9:15 Eastern) as things kick off.

9:05AM - Alright, we're here and registered! We'll be checking in as things get going shortly.
9:26AM - It's minglin' time! The space usually reserved for product demos is hollowed out for the Apple Continental Breakfast today, tons of journos and execs hanging out before the keynote kicks off.

It's confirmed: Apple's next event is scheduled for March 6th, next Thursday. It'll be a Town Hall event; obviously new MacBooks and MacBook Pros aren't to be expected, but the unambiguous "iPhone software roadmap" and the image above should help guide our assumptions as to what will be discussed. The SDK's a given, but "exciting new enterprise features," eh?

Are you a CEO hoping to "step it up," "knock it out of the park," and generally "take it to the bridge" -- old-school style -- but you can't seem to work the magic? Well, BusinessWeek has got just the thing for you: a ten-point plan on how to deliver a presentation like our main man, Steve Jobs. Breaking it down from "set a theme" all the way to "rehearse, rehearse, rehearse," the cats at BW lay out everything you need to know to shatter sales records, hike your stock, and innovate the hell out of a keynote. Of course, they don't advise you on choice of outfits (we suggest jeans, sneakers, and a turtleneck), products to launch (how does iPhone 2 sound to you?), or how to properly execute a "Boom!" ("Boom!") -- but we're pretty sure you can suss those details out on your own. If you want the full breakdown of tips and tricks, including how to properly appear excited about your own products, hit the read link ASAP. To help you along, we've included a clip of Jobs doing his thing after the break. Boom!

You brought AOL to its knees, you took out the Apple online store, but now the true test: can the power of one billion fanboys take on Akamai?

Update: The answer was a quick yes -- but we're sneaky and figured out the direct link. Have fun, kids.

Thanks for joining us for our live Macworld 2008 keynote coverage! We're in, so click on, all our real-time updates are posted just after the break.

Tomorrow morning the tech world will tune in as Steve gets on stage to kick off another Macworld expo -- an event Apple usually uses for only its biggest product announcements. There are all kind of crazy rumors going around, but this year there are a few picks that have seem to stuck: an ultraportable MacBook (Pro) of some kind, iTunes movie rentals, and, of course, the iPhone SDK. But what rabbit will El Jobso pull out of his hat marked one-more-thing? Find out tomorrow when we bring you our live coverage at 9AM PT (and check out other local times here).

For those not paying attention, there's a "leaked" Macworld 2008 keynote making the rounds today, and we'd just like to make sure you know it's completely and utterly false. Not only is it one of many fabricated keynotes making the rounds this year, and part of an annual ritual of keynote fabrications, but it even manages to be self-damning with its listing of a Mac Pro refresh -- which obviously happened last week. Let's try a little harder, people!

[Thanks to everyone who sent this in]

Comcast is going to kick off their keynote at CES 2008 any minute now and we're here to bring you the latest from the world of the largest cable provider in the US.

9:08AM - Gary Shapiro takes the stage and is excited to have the first chief exec from a cable company. We start out with a little history about Comcast. Now they are the 4th largest phone company.