According to Intel, your computer-security fears will be a thing of the distant past thanks to its latest vPro technology update. Apparently, the new safe-guarding apparatus is a combination of the company's Core 2 Duo processors and the Q35 Express chipset, in addition to several "technology innovations" that the chipmaker says will fortify business-centric systems against "software-based attacks," as well as viruses and the ominously vague "other threats." New components of the technology include Intel's Trusted Execution Technology (TXT, AKA LaGrande), which isolates assigned memory and protects it from access via unauthorized software, and improved system defense filters, which can identify a larger number of threats in network traffic. "Today, the business desktop PC just got more secure," says a company spokesperson, though for our system "protection" we're sticking to NoDoz and nunchucks.

Amazingly, the Oak Ridge National Laboratory (ORNL) is actually not located in the UK, but we wouldn't doubt if the latest development to emerge from its confines somehow ends up across the pond. Nevertheless, scientists at the lab have developed a Laser-Based Item Monitoring System that "addresses surveillance requirements in places where video would be unacceptable because of the presence of proprietary information or other privacy concerns." Essentially, this optical monitoring system uses low-cost reflective tags placed on objects, and then maps the precise location of high-value items to sense tampering. The laser can purportedly detect minute changes (movements of less than a centimeter) by utilizing "a high-resolution two-axis laser scanner capable of looking at a 60-degree field of view in 0.0005-degree increments," meaning that it can divide its field of view into more than 10 billion individual pointing locations. The crew also noted that this system was generally superior to bar code and RFID alternatives as the LBIMS would not be susceptible to jamming or interception, but there's no word just yet on when the Department of Energy (or anyone else) will be putting this stuff to good use.

[Via Smartmobs, photo courtesy of Primidi]

We know, we're suckers for cheesy art, but we give props where props are due for the well designed, masterfully engineered pieces as well. While we doubt the Digital Stag is atop any thief's list of things to swipe, there's a decent chance the Italian funeral urn Cratere dei Niobidi is. This urn spurned (ahem) a restorer and a geophysicist to envision sonic tomography as a means to protecting authentic works of art and giving museums and art buyers alike a way to spot fakes. The system works by attaching a network of sensors in and around the artifact, and when tapped with a rubber hammer, computer software can record the sonic fingerprint that will only match up with the original. Additionally, the waves could inform restorers if a segment of a structure is weaker than the eye can tell, giving them extra time to build reinforcements on ancient buildings, walls, etc. The chance of such a system ever being used outside of highly trafficked museums, however, is slim, primarily due to the $19,000 to $26,000 price range that the system falls in, not to mention the "trained staff" (read: loyal and innocent) required to run it.

It should already be fairly obvious that your iPod is a hot commodity, and the last thing you need is a crazed individual taking a stab at you, or worse, swiping your portable. You've already been warned by the NYPD that rocking the token white headphones is a big no-no, and Thomas Pink even designed a shirt and tie to keep iPod-jackers at bay, but the folks over at CNET UK have a few tricks of their own to keep you from becoming a statistic. As you may or may not be aware, gadget theft in Britain is out of control, and the methods were devised after a CNET UK editor was mugged, not too dissimilar from a situation of our own. The gaffer tape method consists of taping the iPod to your body -- using 15 rounds of tape -- so that your assailant gets frustrated with the challenge and hopefully gives up pursuit, while the paperback method throws back to secrecy of old by suggesting you remove an inner chunk of a novel to let your iPod reside, and since most thieves don't care about bestsellers, you'll likely avoid a tragic conclusion. For owners living in really sketch areas, the Christopher Walken method is nearly foolproof: for Pulp Fiction fans, the iPod's hiding location comes as no surprise. For more clever disguising options to keep you and your Apple tagalong safe, be sure to hit the read link for CNET UK's suggestions, complete with "Anti-mugger" ratings and all.