With all of the hype and excitement surrounding Apple products, it's clear that the company has created a climate for a massive and sustained backlash. Well, according to a new report in The Onion, Wall Street forecasters have set a date for the tide to turn: March 21st, 2008. According to Goldman Sachs analyst Steven Shore, a shift in attitude will occur which will cause users of the Cupertino juggernaut's products to, "Look down at their glossy white or black devices and feel a sense of embarrassment and gullibility." Shore went on the say, "They will realize that, despite all the sleek design, they got caught up in a wave of hype that made them shell out additional hundreds of dollars for options and features they didn't need." The report claims that Apple will respond to the news with the release of a mint-green iPod in late October, though we have our doubts that the company is considering anything lighter than emerald.

Self-proclaimed "America's finest news source" The Onion reports that Activision's latest virtual-instrument title, Sousaphone Hero, isn't selling as well as the company had hoped, despite a $25M development budget, innovative wireless sousaphone controller, and versions available for PS3, 360, and Wii. Complaints range from the title's $345 price tag, repetitive gameplay, lack of non-marching-band music, and unresponsive "oompah" meter, while pro sousaphone players have taken umbrage at the lack of realism in the game. "The fingering's completely different, for starters," according to one sousaphonist The Onion interviewed. The report also says Activision is considering shelving three more planned Hero titles due to the tepid response, including the hotly-anticipated Cymbal Hero. Looks like the golden age of marching bands is truly at an end.

[Via Joystiq]

Crazy, we knew The Onion had some pretty reliable sources inside Apple, but who would have thought the Stevephone reproduces through asexual mitosis? And we still think $600 is a lot, but an iPhone hat clearly makes it a fantastic value.

We do love The Onion around these parts, and when Onion coverage does cross over into Engadget territory, we find it's usually best to let those guys speak for themselves:

"'We looked at [the iPhone's] innovative user interface, the paradigm-shifting voicemail, the best-in-class mobile browser, and we realized we could make all that seem ridiculously outdated by the time the product becomes available to customers in June,' said Jobs, who described the project as 'Apple reinventing the iPhone.'"

We really love that Palm's sponsoring the page, too. [Potentially NSFW in and around The Onion.]

[Thanks, Duke]